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F#CK YOU, 2020, and… I LOVED YOU!

Crazy, I know, right? But it’s true! This year was truly unlike any other, that’s for sure. It seemed like some months went on for years themselves!
All year I’ve heard people complaining that it’s just the worst and needs to be gone. I’m sure I’ve said that myself at some point. Yet, I chose not to dwell on the horrible.
I experienced some crushing blows this year, as I do every year, and also have had some triumphs. At times I felt like I was just getting double-unders, but the next day I am covered in whipping marks from the jumprope. It’s so easy to overlook the good when the rotten happens to us. However, I believe mindset truly is the key! It’s one thing we have control over! So often we try to control everything to no avail. I realized that by complaining about all the things going wrong, the losses, keeps me in victim mode. Victim mode leads to: NOTHING. It keeps you where you are. Gratitude is where it’s at! I know that all sounds so cliché, but try it and tell me it doesn’t work. 2020 was a chance to rewrite my story.

2020 took from me my best friend and companion of nearly 17 years, Rupert. This boy literally saved my life when I had gadolinium poisoning in 2018. He knew my every mood and showed me absolute unconditional love.
He went from thriving as a senior kitty, to suddenly being diagnosed with a massive stomach tumor/cancer. I was devastated. Making the decision to say goodbye was the hardest decision of my life. Yet I have gratitude. For what, you ask? Well, gratitude for the years he gave me, and tried to hold on even though he was in pain. Gratitude that I was able to be with him and holding him as his heart stopped, looking into his eyes. To me that was a precious moment I can only be grateful for. I asked him to help me find a kitty who needed love, and Rupe sent me Sam, who makes me laugh every day, even when he is a terror, also daily. 😊 So grateful.

2020 took my coaching business as I knew it from me. What began as a ground-breaking year for Healthy Awakening, into which I have poured my heart and soul for over 5 years now, crashed and burned with the onset of the COVID shutdown. Healthy things like gyms and parks were shut down, yet fast food, booze and weed stores were deemed “essential.” I saw people posting photos of huge alcohol grabs from the store, discussing lockdown weight gain and how they were now eating so much junk…things that crush the immune system and put one into a higher risk category for ANY disease or illness. It was, let’s wait for a vaccine, not do things that create a healthy immune system and significantly reduce risk of dis-ease in the body. There were a few people who began coaching with me after taking stock of their health and wellness goals while in lockdown. Their lives have been transformed…Grateful!! I was no longer able to get out and meet with people to promote myself (I don’t tend to translate well online). What is the upside? I put my intentions out there to find people I could partner with—to reach and help more people attain optimal health and not live in fear.
I began attracting wonderful like-minded people! So very grateful to be building businesses with people whom I love and respect, and have the same visions. I let myself go into “woe is me,” mode this fall, and it kept me there. I made a conscious effort to change into my gratitude mode in the beginning of December, and am starting three new clients on January 4th. A dear friend hired me to support him on his journey to defeating cancer. So, my career is taking amazing turns and I’m so excited for these collaborations to fully launch, while being a part of more journeys! Grateful and so blessed!!

2020 showed me people who live in fear. Fear of a virus. Fear of other people. Fear of LIVING. It also showed me there are people who are unafraid. Unafraid to love, live out loud, cherish life more than they fear death due to a hug.
I respect people’s rights to choose how they live, and I’m grateful there are others who will not stop hugging and connecting with loved ones. The lockdown truly showed me how to love my own company more than ever. It also showed me how much I NEED connection in my life. I am a connector, it’s how I’m wired. I had relationships end in 2020, and women telling me to “stay single, it’s easier.” And it’s better not to need anyone. Well, that’s not me! Something ending means something better is beginning! If we fight to stay in situations that are not in our greatest good, we keep ourselves from the great things and people to enter. Humans need connection. WE thrive on connection. 2020 had me see that part of me and love it. I take what I learn and move forward. Love is my basis for everything I do in my life, that will never cease. I’ve always been a warrior, and 2020 taught me to be softer, more vulnerable…be ME. Grateful!

2020 showed me who my true friends were and were not. I let those who brought me down go to the wayside. It’s like a weight being lifted. I found new members of my soul tribe—and it continues to grow! I reconnected with friends from over 20 and 30 years, who came back into my life as if they never left. My heart and soul grow bigger every single day with these people in it, and you know who you are!

2020 gave my body its issues with injuries and a not-so-fun Lyme flare. Yet, my body amazes me! It heals because I treat it like the gift it is. Thus, my body took me on many incredible hiking, biking, trail running, snowshoeing and SUP adventures! It allows me to do crossfit and have fun with it, and returned to my old gym. It allowed me to take up rock climbing in my mid-50s. I see setbacks as just that…temporary… and continue to do all the things that optimize me, not give these other things control over my mind and body.

2020 brought me COVID dating. Sorry, but if you have a mask on in your profile photo, automatic left swipe. HA I have a first date tonight, for New Year’s Eve. I’ll leave it at that… 😊

On this last day of 2020 I am grateful. Every event/situation that seems insurmountable is actually a gift. It’s a gift of a lesson or a blessing to move you forward. Saying goodbye to loved ones is never, ever easy. Lord knows I’ve had enough loss in my life. Not one is easier than another. But I know those I lost want me to remember them and live large. I feel that 2020 has so many lessons and blessings if we LOOK FOR THEM. What we focus on is what we attract. I am going into the new year with excitement, not to leave this year, but for the new beginnings that 2020 has provided me. With peace. Peace, knowing that I am on my journey, on the path that is in my highest good. Fighting for what I believe in, that will not change, but finding a peace in where I am TODAY, and appreciation for all the wonderful things headed my way. I’m so excited to be on this path with my soul tribe! GRATITUDE…IT IS A CHOICE!! How do you want to live in 2021? The only change comes from within, not the numbers in the year. How will you adapt, overcome, embrace 2021’s challenges and blessings? Choose wisely, and Happy New Year!

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